Those who enjoy my insanity..........

Thursday, August 27, 2009

The Destruction of a Family

For 31 years now I have grown up in a very loving, tight knit, large family. My mother is one of 8 siblings. My grandmother had 20 grandchildren, 21 great grandchildren and I think 1 great great grand child. My female cousins (who are around the same age) are my best friends and I go to them first. Everyone lives within 20 miles of each other and gathering for birthdays, bbq's and celebrations happened frequently and most of us talked on the phone once a week, if not daily. Knowing that if there was anything we ever needed we could turn to our family members for support. Unfortunately that is no longer.

The root of our family, my grandmother, passed away a few months ago and one of her dying wishes was that her family took care of each other after she was gone. Her wish was not granted. That wish has gone up in flames. There was a very tragic day that we found out that one of the elder relatives had been inappropriately touching a much younger one and it was devastating to say the least. We couldn't believe what we were hearing, couldn't even grasp the idea and couldn't even imagine in our worst nightmares it happening to one of our own children. It was hard enough to deal with it just knowing this child and seeing an innocence lost and never returned.

Not knowing what else to do the police were called, a report was made and the investigation began. Little did we know how devastating it really would be to our family and how people that you thought you knew, you didn't really know at all. People were upset for not keeping it in the family and trying to figure out another alternative; knowing that if convicted, a family member would inevitably spend time in jail and have their lives ruined because of very bad choices that had been made. Choices made, that make you wonder if it was the first time or had other lives been ruined in the past that we don't even know about.

In one week our lives had been turned upside down with a confession, an arrest and a suicide.

Yes, my family member took their life after getting out of jail on bond, rather than face the consequences of their actions. Leaving behind unanswered questions, problems, hurt, anger sorrow and grief. Grief that this person will be missed no matter what they did, anger that it was done and the easy way was taken out, the problems of cleaning up the mess (financial etc....) that he made and so many questions that a child alone cannot answer. Unless some sort of a break through is made in counseling, I don't think any of us will know the full extent of the abuse.

Now, 2 months later, their isn't a family member who is really on good terms with anyone and the sad part is that I don't think anyone really knows what they're fighting about. My grandmothers house is on the market and the estate being divided has been horrible. Brother and sisters treating each other horribly, backstabbing and cruel comments and a practical disownment of some members. As a younger generation, we saw no other alternative to the original problem, which was the abuse. The older generation does not agree and is very unhappy with the outcome of it. Fingers are being pointed and the blame is being put anywhere it can be. They don't understand that the only person they can blame is my uncle who is now gone from this earth. He made all of those decisions and ruined so many lives. There is so much anger running through the veins of this family and I don't believe it will ever be fixed. The names have been called and the fingers have been pointed, there is no going back.

The saddest part of the whole situation is the fact that most of the older members (the ones who are being so selfish and hurtful) have completely forgotten who the important one is in this situation. The child, the VICTIM. She will never be innocent again, she will remember this for the rest of her life, she will always have unanswered questions and possibly nightmares, she will more than likely have issues as an adult that will take years of therapy. Her mother will always have that guilt and feeling of failure and not being able to protect her child, especially from someone that she trusted. They will both live the rest of their lives feeling like they did something wrong or that they should be blamed for the final outcome. They should NEVER have to feel that way!!!

Anyway, I have remained neutral through it all. Listening to everyone involved and seeing each of their sides, knowing how they are feeling. Ultimately, caught in the middle. This is my family and I love each and every one of them. Not wanting to take sides because that is just not who I am I have tried to stay open to every ones feelings and beliefs. Lord knows everyone is allowed to feel how they feel and grieve how they want to grieve, I'm not one to judge. There are many family members who are not like me and have taken definite sides, making this a very broken family. I don't see it ever being the same or even close. This breaks my heart and it makes me so sad to even think of it. I just wish that people would come to see who this is all about.

Well my rant is over and I just needed to get that off. Get it out in the open and not have to worry about what you think whether I'm right or wrong.

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Wordful Wednesday, back to school

Well the kids are officially back to school! Can you hear the angels singing?

Shay got into the groove of 4th grade pretty quickly. I only had time to snap a picture of him as he was running out the door. He was probably late for his first day!
Jaxson admitted that he was nervous for his first day. Originally he was thinking it was going to be the same class with the same teachers. When I told him that it wasn't going to be the same, his attitude changed! But after leaving class today (parents stayed with them) he said "I was thinkin that I didn't want to go to this class but now I'm thinkin that I want to". He was so excited! Now we just need Riley to grow up faster (not really). He wants to go to school so bad he can taste it!

Happy Wednesday! For more wordfuls head over to 7 Clown Circus, say hello to Angie and see her brand spankin new back yard (paradise)!!!!

Sticker Shock

A few weeks ago I was cleaning house and vacuuming when I started to smell that rubber on fire, smoking smell that it makes when the belt is shot. I'm sure y'all have smelled it at one time or another! Well the last time it happened I took it over to the repair shop across the street from the house and the nice man looked at it, and replaced the belt at no charge. Different story this time. Not only did it need a new belt but the dog got a hold of my washable filter and ate it while I was cleaning it! I figured I would just go buy a new one and be done with it. Not as easy as I thought it would be, that shop closed down so I had to find a new shop.

I go through the phone book and find the nearest one and I take the stupid thing along with me just in case, drive the 15 minutes to get there (with all 3 kids mind you) and lug it into the shop. The young kid greets me and is very friendly. He helps me out as well as he can (didn't know crap) and offers me a filter that isn't even the right one, but "it will work". He also offers to replace the belt for me. I'm thinking, ok this isn't too bad and then he gives me the price quote. I almost choked on my tongue and my eyeballs about exploded from my skull. $75.00!!! I didn't even pay that much for the freakin vacuum!!! I politely tell him no thanks, I can change the belt on my own and I would rather find the correct filter if I'm going to pay that price (it cost $32.00). I told him that I would just buy the 3 pack of belts and be gone. Ummm they charged me $21.00 for the belts!!!!!!!!!!!!! I headed home fuming and feeling really ripped off and you know what, I was right. The hubby and I went to Lowes awhile later and I found the belts for $1.25 each and the CORRECT filter for $12.00. I. was. pissed. It took me 5 minutes to change the belt and I could have spent less on all of it if I had just gone to Lowes in the first place.

As we were driving home from Lowes I started to call that rip off shop to complain and the hubby told me to let it go. I didn't even get to attempt to get my money back. So the moral of the story is........stay the hell away from repair shops unless absolutely necessary.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Wordful Wednesday

It has really been a crazy week around here, again. My mother in law is in town, Shay has been out of town with his Dad and Grandparents, school starts next week..............hmmm what else? Since I have so many pictures, I think I'm going to have to do a week in pictures post again!
Here we go

We got to spend some time goofing around with great grandpa at the airport while we waited for Grandma Lesa and Aunt Chris. The boys absolutely love him to death and he lets them do just about anything to him!
We got rid of a crap load of stuffed animals. For any friends, relatives or anyone who might give my children gifts, PLEASE, NO MORE STUFFED ANIMALS! Seriously, they are invading and taking over.
Riley came down with Herpangina or what we call hand foot mouth disease. Only he got it REALLY bad only in his mouth. Had ulcers everywhere and felt like crap for a week. He didn't eat anything either. I felt so bad for him!
Shay went up to Granby for 4 days with his dads side of the family for some boating fun. The cat gave him a black eye............I know that sounds really odd huh? Long story short he got in between the cat and the neighbors dog.

Whew..... I think I got most of it!

For more Wordful Wednesday posts head on over to 7 Clown Circus and give Angie a shout.

Have a wonderful Wednesday!

Monday, August 17, 2009

For those of you who have never seen.......

We took a trip out to denver International Airport on Saturday to pick up my mother in law and I took a few pictures of the Airport for those of you have never been through!

It's out in the middle of nowhere and it takes 45 minutes to an hour to get there depending on traffic and which way you take. So we all loaded up and went to pick grandma up.

Here is the outside of it, from a distance. There is also the wierd giant blue horse statue that greets everyone at the entrance to the airport. To read all about it, how it killed it's creator and it's red eyes click here.
The inside is really neat, it's so bright and airy. It makes great light for pictures!

Friday, August 14, 2009

Teaching him right and VGNO

My oldest son has always had in interest in the kitchen since he was very little. He has always wanted to help mix, stir and test what ever I'm cooking. Now that he's old enough I think it's time for him to learn how to actually "make" something.

It would be a comfort to know that when he grows up he can fend for himself and actually make a meal that doesn't consist of puncturing the plastic and cooking for 3 minutes on high!

We started out simple................scrambled eggs. After showing him the process I know he felt proud that he was able to do it. Now I just hope he doesnt think that he can just cook whenever he would like. He still has to be supervised! Now on to things that are more adult Friendly! TGIF and you know what that means......It's time for a Virtual Girls Night Out! Ann will be our host this evening, so go check her out at Ann again and again. She is reminiscing about the good old days, so I think I can come up with something to reminisce about........

First I need a drink, anyone up for a Naranjita? What is that you ask? Well here you go..........Enjoy. 1 oz. Light puerto rican rum
2-3 oz ginger ale
1 oz orange juice orange slices for garnish
carambola fruit (star fruit) for garnish
Combine all ingredients in highball glasses and garnish w/ orange and carambola.
Why is it when you want to remember something that nothing really special comes to mind? Oh well, sorry, maybe I will come up with something while blog hopping tonight! Have a wonderful weekend!

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Wordful Wednesday

Ok, so now that it's almost the middle of August, we are finally starting to feel like summer around here! It has been a very strange year as far as seasons go, I think we got all screwed up.

Anyway, my tomato plant FINALLY has a ripe tomato on it! It has finally decided to start growing and I have about 20 little green ones that will be ready in a few weeks I'm sure. We have had sooooo much rain here, nothing is growing. I'm so glad I didn't plant a ton of flowers this year. The ones that I did plant look like hell. I'm hoping in the next week or so they will start to look good (or better) now that we are getting some sun.

I can say that we have had some pretty cool sun sets though. All of those clouds make for some gorgeous color! 2 minutes later..................

The boys have a sudden obsession with markers. It started out with coloring gobbs of pictures then.........Dad had to show them how to give themselves tattoos (because you know, they're wash off, so it's ok)! Nice. Since it's wash off that means that they come off on every couches have tints of green and blue, their clothes have tints of red, and I look like a rainbow from them touching me. Thanks for the great idea daddy!!! Guess who got a bath before bed time?

For more Wordful Wednesday posts head on over and Visit Angie at 7 Clown Circus!Happy Wednesday and have a wonderful week.

Friday, August 7, 2009

Week in pictures

This week seemed to be pretty busy. We did a lot and still had time to just hang out at home.

We got to hang out at the beach for a day.

A visit to the dentist for some over due cleanings and xrays. Jaxson wasn't too sure about the gritty toothpaste they use to polish teeth.

My nephew Phoenix is getting so big. He got his first 2 teeth this week.

They think they're posing for me....................

Police vs Fire Olympics, football tournament. What a couple of dorks!

Of course today is Friday and Ann is hosting another Virtual Girls Nite Out. Stop by and join the party!

Wednesday, August 5, 2009

wordful wednesday, at the beach

Going to the beach.......Colorado style!
I took the kids to Bear Creek Lake Park to play on the beach at Soda Lake. It was a first for all of us and we all had a lot of fun! We will definitely be going back. I cant complain, it was $5 for all of us to get in (for the whole day), the kids got to make sand castles, play in the water, have a picnic and I got to lay in the sun and just enjoy! I personally HATE getting into lakes, I think they are disgusting, dirty and I cant see a damn thing that's in them, but I wont discourage the kids from enjoying them! Especially if Daddy is planning on buying a boat and living on a lake for the rest of our summers.
For more wordful Wednesdays, head over to 7 Clown Circus and read about Angie's critter issues.
I was also watching the news tonight and saw a really cute video of our own critters. They are so stinking bear cubs! click here to watch the clip.

Monday, August 3, 2009

Monday Menu Plan

I have been so lazy lately and just not in a cooking mood. I'm not real sure why either! This week is going to be tough for me, but here goes.......

Monday - Beef Stroganoff

Tuesday - Spaghetti, garlic bread and salad

Wednesday - Chicken fajita's, black beans and rice with homemade pico de gallo

Thursday - Burgers on the grill with fries and fruit

Friday - Pizza nite

Saturday - it's gonna have to be leftovers, I'm working!

Sunday - Homemade Lasanga with salad and rolls

If you're feeling stuck like I am, head on over to the Organizing Junkie and get a load of ideas for dinner!!!!


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